Terrible Relationship Advice… (Part III)

The best example of this is Vinnaithaandi Varuvaayaa (2010); Kartick (Simbu) sees Jessie (Trisha), and instantly falls in love with her. He then spends the next half of the movie obsessing over her. She repeatedly rejects his advances but he ignores it and continues to pursue her. It reaches a point where she out of desperation pleads with him if they could “just be friends” and his response to this was…

God damn, keep your libido in check brother! You have only known her a few days!

Can you imagine someone coming out with this line in real life?!

Guy: Hey

Girl: Oh…Hi…how are you? Not seen you since…err…this morning outside my house?  

Girl: Okkkk…but I live in Wimbledon, and you live and work in Mile End?!

Guy: Yeah, yeah…my sat nav is playing up! Anyway, do you fancy meeting up for a drink sometime?

Girl: Look, I have already told you several times..I dont see you in that way….can we just be friends?

Guy: Friends…FRIENDS?! I WANT TO MAKE LOVE TO YOU ALL THE TIME!!!

So, what would happen next? Well, according to Kollywood and Vinnaithaandi Varuvaayaa, the girl will eventually do a complete U-turn and declare that she has always been in love with the guy, proving that he was right all along to put pressure on her and ignore her initial request to “Back the hell off!”

No doubt some of you VTV fans will now scream, “Simbu and Trisha dont end up together at the end of Vinnaithaandi Varuvaayaa” – that’s not the point! The point is that Vinnaithaandi Varuvaayaa is just one in a long line of Tamil movies that promote the idea that men should persist and continue to harass women who initially reject their romantic advances, because the woman will eventually change her mind if you pester her long enough. This theme needs to stop since it promotes the myth that a woman does not know her own mind and a man needs to tell her what she wants. In the real world, no woman will accept this level of pressure. They will either run off and/or call the police and the guy… Well rather than breaking into a verse of “Hosanna” in some exotic location with his dream girl, he will be having it sung to him by some big dude in a prison shower room.

My advice? Simple! If a girl rejects you. Get over it. Move on. Move onto her friend. That will teach her.